October 2009
4 posts
Wheres that girl from last night
a better slumber was in your arms, spent tangled up in you, a sudden mourning crashed in the room, with an uninvited sudden change in you what can i say? wheres that girl from last night whos slept on that side and looks just like you do? you can sleep in your own bed tonight, sleep away a silent pain screaming out my name, you can sleep in your own bed tonight i hope for your sake you dont wake...
I need you so much closer, so come on.
My mind has recently developed this internal alarm clock that wakes me up every morning at six something, and it’s driving me insane. I don’t go to sleep every night untill 2ish so that leaves me with about four hours of solid sleep each night. That can’t be healthy, but the fact that I’ve watched almost every sunrise/sunset for the past week or so makes me feel like...
“I miss her smell and the way she tastes. It’s a mystery of human chemistry and I...”
– High Fidelity
10:24 pm
I’m at a point where I think about tomorrow being just another day, where everything goes wrong and more things get messed up.
Mood: Stuck Music: Pixies - Hey
September 2009
6 posts
Sometimes you just gotta put pride aside.
Glad to have you back. You’ve been greatly missed.
I'd be drizzle and you'd be hurricane.
“i believe in god, only i spell it nature.”
– frank lloyd wright
the only thing that I've been waiting for.
she’s simple yet confusing, her sparkling eyes make me weak at my words
August 2009
3 posts
4:56am
If you’re my girl Swirl me around your room with feeling And as we twirl The glow in the dark stars on your ceiling Will shine for us As love sweeps over the room Cuz we tend to make Each other blush
12:39am
Ugh. I got an incredible offer to move in with these two really down to earth gay boys next month in a really fucking nice place in east boston for a reasonable amount of money and this is all I’ve wanted but thes ONE problem. My mother. She would never allow it. I’m not quite 18 yet so I still can’t move out on my own. Fuck. Fuck.Fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk. I am so sad.
Well…....
2:10pm
I’ve always loved my solitude, but I didn’t know I would be alone one day.. I know I have my family and a few friends, but… Do you ever just feel ..lonely?
(Letting go is the hardest part.)
July 2009
0 posts
11:55pm
I ALWAYS WRITE A HUGE PARAGRAPH THEN I READ IT THEN I DELETE IT THEN I REGRET IT .
June 2009
15 posts
12:58am
Today I had an encounter with two things I hate: 1) Mouse. 2) Police.
Someone needs to help me stop spending so much money lol. I think I have a bit of a problem. Uh oh.
I SHOULD be sleeping bc I work in the morning or working on this poster but instead I’m writting a shitty blog entry.
Oh god.
3:37am - Still not sober.
:Eerf gnil eef; :D-n ‘t(n.ee d): :_ny_n_: B-u- t/(m.e.)#
5:25pm
I haven’t been sober in two days.
1:09am
So… tonight was a crazy night. I’m looking foward to this summer. Of Montreal has been the band of the night. It sucks to have so much to say when you’re asleep.
I cant wait to see you.
3:38am - I'm humbled in your pretty lense
Can I tell you that you are the purple in me? Can I call you just to hear you, would you care? When I saw you put your purple finger on me There’s a feelin’ in your bottle Found your bottle, found your heart Gives a feeling from your bottled little part
Almost four o'clock in the morning
It’s almost four o’clock in the morning
And my mind can’t stop racing
3:24am
The sky has been gray for about a week now and I really like it. Works not too busy, people are mellow, everything is kind of slow and easygoing.. But maybe I’m a little excited about bike rides in the sunshine… And going to the beach. Just a little though.
i like my body when it is with yours
i like my body when it is with your body. It is so quite a new thing. Muscles better and nerves more. i like your body. i like what it does, i like its hows. i like to feel the spine of your body and its bones, and the trembling -firm-smooth ness and which i will again and again and again kiss, i like kissing this and that of you, i like, slowly stroking the, shocking fuzz of your electric fur,...
Sundays used to be so much more exciting.
When I was about five or six I decided to collect ladybugs. I went into my grandma’s yard With a empty box of matches There were tall yellow sunflowers Growing from the ground. (Some were even taller than me.) I looked and looked.. Who knew catching ladybugs would be so hard?
By the time I had a handful of ladybugs in my box, It was already time to eat. I carried the box around untill...
3:16pm
My legs and my back hurt from a tireing weekend. The weather is still shitty. I lose things then find them; call it pure luck.
Reading untill I have to go to work. I wish I didn’t have to go to work.
“When you smoke herb it reveals you to yourself.”
– Bob Marley
HIILOVEMYBESTFRIENDBYE
J: Does smoking weed give you cavities?
A: Um idk, I know it makes your teeth yellow but Idk about vavaties...
J: Haha you said vavaties lol. What have you been doing?
A: You're high. Lol. Sims...
J: Make your Sims have sex.
A: Oh they do all the time ahahaha
A: Ohhhh god fuccck me.
J: What's going on?
A: Just got outta the ER, was there for five hours with my Dad.
J: What's wrong with your dad?
A: He fell off a ladder lol
J: HAHA I love how you just loled at that.
A: Did you take the five hour energy?
J: Hahahah no why does it sound like I did?
A: Yeah you sound really hyper lol
J: I'm just baked yu noeeee
A: Ohhh okay thats why then lol
J: If I mix Aquafina water with Polar Spring water will it still taste like water?
A: ..Yeah it will lol
J: I figured...
J: I get this interior satisfaction when I open up a Starburst without ripping the wrapper.
A: Hahahah it's okay... I do too.
J: I got the tropical kind and I hate the orange ones and the purple ones but they're the only ones I have left ...so I'm doing what I gotta do.
A: Wordddd haha. When I eat spicy food it hurts to take a shit. I love spicy food though.
J: Well thats the price you pay..... Plus however much it costs...
7:46am
It feels like everything I want is completely out of my reach right now.
Things change.
People change.
May 2009
8 posts
12:10am
I need to work on expressing my feelings with certain people more. I have no problem showing love to most people…but with my mom for example, I really suck at it. I got so close to saying I love you today, but l couldn’t do it. Maybe writting it in a note or something will be a little easier… I just want to make sure she knows.
2:26pm
I’m having kind of a hard time making decisions and a good friend told me: “Think about it as 10/10/10.. What will benefit/effect you in 10 days/10 months/10 years.” I honestly think that was one of the best advices I’ve ever gotten.
I’ve always wanted to have a better life than my parents, have a really good job, go to a really good school, buy a really big house,...
5:01pm
:). just :). Know what I mean, jellybean?
Mood: :) Music: Little Wings - Ramblin’
11:57am
I can’t even begin to explain how in love I am with this picture. It was taken by one of my favorite photographers David Armstrong in 1979. So amazing.
This is rediculous
Tonight sucked.
10:48pm
I feel like the last 5 months flew by.
9:26am
Getting out of bed was the hardest thing I did today. I am taking today off. I have this song on repeat and I can’t stop listening to it. It makes me feel so okay. I can’t wait untill this weekend. ..Now back to sleep!
Mood: My fingers are still crossed. Music: The Microphones - My Roots Are Strong and Deep
Note to Self:
Never have a huge crush on someone who will never have a crush on you and give them your number.. Now you will never eat another Brie Melt again.
April 2009
5 posts
9:27am
Staying home from school today once again. I just want it to be over. 40 something days left? Ugh..
I went to the Fall Out Boy concert last night, which was fun. I’m not really a fan of pop rock but I’ll always love them just because I’ve been a fan for so long.
Other than that I’ve been working 20-30 hours a week and going to school. My life is sooooo eventful.
10:47pm
Life has been crazy lately. I’ve been working everyday. At first it was very tireing/stressful, but I finally got the hang of it and everything is running smoothly now. I’m buying a vintage bike this week, and a macbook next week. Stoked. And I’m training to work at Renee’s Cafe on Saturdays, HELL YEAH! I may be becoming a bit of a workaholic but I’m making big bucks...
12:45am
Lately I’ve been kind of wondering why I know the people I know, and why I don’t know the people I don’t know.. I look at all the people around me and I can’t help but wish I knew every one of them. Everyone is different and everyone has their own story, and I would love to know more people and learn from their experiances and be a better me. It’s nuts that all the...
I think I'm too ahead of myself..
I feel really disconnected from everyone and everything right now. Maybe it’s because I haven’t had much to do lately. I always end up feeling like this when I have too much time on my hands to think about my life and the people in it. Honestly, I really just want to drop out of school, work full time, live on my own, and go on a vacation. I wanna go to Italy. Or London. Or maybe...
“You don’t appriciate something untill you lose it.”
– Unknown
March 2009
6 posts
4:35pm
I used to update this thing religiously but now I don’t care much for it anymore. Life’s been so good lately (for the most part). So many good times. Love it! I’m sick of filling up numerous applications online, going job hunting 2+ times a week, and not getting a call back. I NEED A JOB! I am in desperate need of one in the time being. Wish me luck. Other than that, I...
3:19am
I wish I could stop my brain from working sometimes. Over thinking and over analyzing things is driving me a bit crazy. I have a headache. 3am shower then hopefully relaxing for the rest of the night. I’m thinking tomorrows gonna be a good day. Well, better than today was, most deffinetly.
Turn that frown up-side-down!
1:15pm
You’re so cute.
(written by kids)
You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the chips and dip coming. — Alan, age 10 No person really decides before they grow up who they’re going to marry. God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you’re stuck with… — Kristen, age 10 WHAT...
February 2009
20 posts
3:32am
I want to know your story.
Bowl of Oranges
The rain had started tapping On the window near my bed There was a loophole in my dreaming So I got out of it And to my surprise my eyes were wide And already open Just my nightstand and my dresser Where those nightmares had just been So I dressed myself and left then Out into the gray streets But everything seemed different Completely new to me The sky, the trees, houses, buildings ...